Thursday, November 11

Day 11: On Pet Peeves

People often ask you, "What's your pet peeve?" as if you're only supposed to have one. In my adult years I've worked really hard at teaching myself how to accept people and their behaviors, regardless of how they affect me, without reacting to them.

Until the other day.

Mostly I'm A Listener, which is the way I like it. Those of you who know me know I'll let you ramble on while I smile and nod. "Mmm-hmmm..." I mean, unless it's the kind of conversation where I interject my flippant opinions and facetious sarcasm. For this example, Internet, you can refer to me as A Listener. Got it?

I found myself following a conversation of a person describing going home for the holidays. The physical direction this person was going was West. Not East, North, or South. I knew this based on the city he/she was referring to.

Person: I'll be heading toward [this city] next week for the holidays...
Me: Mmm-hmmm...
Person: ...and I'm not sure how long I'll be Down There.
Me: Mmm-hmmm...Down There?

This person also had plans to go Up There to Iowa City.

Being in Eastern Iowa, said city is to our west, and it's Over There. Iowa City is South and undoubtedly Down There while we are Up There from there. Anything South of here can now be referred to as Down There. Anything North, like Minnesota or Canada, hell, even Decorah, is Up There. The Mississippi River? East.

Hello, my name is Emily and I am a Directional Bigot. I will react negatively to your Directional Disability. Kind of like They're, Their, and There. Or You're and Your. But different.

3 comments:

Kristi said...

I'm coming out of the closet as a Directional Bigot myself. CMON PEOPLE! I'm horrible at directions, but I've seen a few maps in my life to know whether I'm going up, down or around.

Doug said...

From me, alright?!?! You learned it from me!

Love,
Pa

Carol said...

My directional bigotry deals specifically with the a-holes who go the wrong way in the lanes of parking lots. THERE'S an ARROW that point you in the right direction, fool!